Its almost that time!

Tomorrow is the big day! I go in for surgery at 9:30am then it begins at 11:30am. I am beyond nervous right now, but I know it will all turn out okay. My day has been pretty stressful with tight deadlines that work has for me to attempt to accomplish by the end of the work day. I am fried, I have so much homework to finish tonight to be on the ball so when I return to class I will be in an okay grade. So tonight is going to be a little busy. Last night I swam for about a good thirty minutes which felt so good! I cannot express how refreshing it was!!

Thats all for right now, later I will post something more interesting than this thirty second post

 

Kaylee

You are a BEAST…

You are a BEAST!
A wild animal ready to attack!
Powerful & Sexy & Strong
Men and Women want to sleep with you
You can’t conceal your charm
You are an unstoppable force!
Straight-Up Bad Ass!
You totally got this! ❤

I love this quote! I found it on Pinterest tonight while listening to shuffle list on Pandora. The count down is now down to 2 days, and it has been such a growing journey up to surgery date but the journey is not over once I have surgery. This quote reminds me of all my loved ones who are behind me 100%, telling me these things. I finally believe it, some days it was harder than most but I know I got this. I am a straight bad ass with a charm to please myself and the hundreds surrounding me. I have let my negativity hit the road and let in the all the positives. 

ONE Week!

Okay, so I can officially now say that it is one week till surgery!! I have three work days left and a weekend. My plan for the weekend is to take a trip up to Frankenmuth just for fun hopefully with my best friend at my side. This will help calm my nerves before next week, but like all weekends they go quickly. I am getting pretty nervous/excited! But I know that the procedure will go great!

So this week I had a doctors appointment on Tuesday which I found out that I have lost 4.3 pounds since last week which makes my total weight loss at 27.9 pounds pre surgery. I am hoping to loose another 4 pounds between now and then. Going out with a bang before surgery! I am sill on the diet, which has changed to all liquids. I will still admit that it is very hard! I have held my head up high as I face the daily challenges of food, I miss eating. I am not crying over it but I miss it. Soup, shakes, and puddings get tiring after awhile, and loose the flavoring as well. I have picked up different flavored extracts like butter, maple, rum, carmel, and rootbeer; I have made a breakfast shake that taste like pancakes with the butter, maple, and vanilla extracts with a tsp of half & half. It doesn’t beat having the real thing but it come close. I have skipped a family dinner to stay away from temptation, and constantly faced with it at work. They don’t eat the best but its work. The smell of food still makes my stomach growl, but I have water for that to help with. Also I have been craving a McDonalds greasy, no nutritional value whatso ever hamburger but I haven’t broke down to eat one (pat on the back).

I want to bring up something, not really an issue but its for my family and friends if they do read this. I have been posting this blog on my Facebook, and it is open for all to read. I have made statuses saying how excited I am for something coming up in a few weeks, but haven’t explained why I am. Well family please read this also friends read this. This will give you a better look on what I am going through, please respect my privacy and not post on the family Facebook page on what is going on. Also on the day of the surgery do not post “Thinking of you” or “Keeping you in my prayers” I will live through this, but send me a private message, text, or call. I have sent personal messages to people I would like to know. Please let me know if you have questions and I will answer them to the best of my ability. Thank you!

Well I am done rambling for now, next post will be about my awesome supporters I have. You might want to grab some tissues for that one 😉

That’ All Folks!

Love Always,

Kaylee

Just a quick update

Well, today I had a EGD done by Dr. Lane. I had to be up at the ass crack of dawn to be at the hospital on my day off. I was knocked out and she looked at my stomach to make surd there isnt nothing seriously wrong, which there isnt. Mom got to meet the surgeon and chat with her for a few. For excerise today I went to the mall and walked tonight and did spend some money but thats okay. This next week I am officially on all liquid diet which is hard but I can do it.  I need to get creative and make some tasty concoction with the vanilla shake of death. I am doing great drinking my water but I will admit its harder for me to drink it at home for some reason. But as of next wednesday its a week till surgery! The nerves havent set in yet but I am sure they will. That week is sure going to fly by.

 

All for tonight folks!

Love,

Kaylee

Picture This

I am a photographer, but I hate my picture taken if it is a full length picture. I have always have had awesome self esteem on the outside but on the inside I hate how I look. I second guess what I wear everyday. I am a beautiful woman who needs to have my picture taken!

Extra virgin post!

Well, today is marking my count down to the big surgery date!! Which is November 20th of this year, two weeks until this operation is on its way.

I am starting to feel excited and nervous at the same time, with every surgery there is a risk of complications. I am reminded of this but have the most amazing faith in my surgeon Dr. Lane. Who is a hardass, and I am excited to prove to her I have what it takes! Right now Sparrow Weight Management has me on a all “Product” diet which is shakes, puddings, soups, and bars this is to help me loose weight before surgery. Any weight that I take off before the big day is awesome, because it helps shrink my liver so Dr. Lane can move it around and also that my belly will be smaller and she can have more room. So far with this diet I have been craving salt more than anything, I already have gotten rid of salt in my apartment and used seasonings as a substitute. If you were on this diet you would crave about anything right now! Well I caved and had a pickle that was the only thing in my fridge and some popcorn. It did feel like the foods of the gods but I felt like shit after because I knew I had to drink twice water to flush it out.

I am making huge strides in getting rid of bad habits, and I am loving it! I have more energy to do things, and overall feel better. I used to eat when I felt stressed, and sad. No I wasn’t that person who cried and had a bucket of ice cream that had salty tears in it as I shove in my pot hole. But to comfort me after crying was to turn on a tv and sit down with junk food and eat it, yes I reflected on what happened that day but got over it right then. In turn of events that stress never went away and the next day it hit me in the face like a hard book. So that whole stress eating is taken care of now, I can successfully say now when I feel stressed I make a craft, go for a walk, or grab my awesome expensive camera and take pictures of random stuff.

I have had temptations all over the place since I started this diet, one temptation is to drink with friends. When I started this I had a Halloween party to attend at my best friends place. I went and bought five liter bottles of water so I can drink that instead of drinking alcohol. I started out pretty good, until they started to peer pressure me in to drinking and taking a shot. I got pissy because I was sick of explaining to them that I cannot drink at all! So I left early from the party. Also on top of that I wasn’t feeling all that good, my head was pounding and I was extremely tired. I am sorry best friend if you are reading this! You know I love you! Another temptation with alcohol was when I went out a weekend ago to yet another Halloween party but this time it was at a bar. Little background info on this bar, my best friend and I go here to dance and not get judged. I love going there because it is near our hometown, and I don’t have to peel off creeps from my behind when I dance. So we went, and they got the message that KAYLEE IS NOT DRINKING and I didn’t (WOHOO) But I had people buy me drinks which I gave away to other drunks, made sure they knew that they were “purdy” before handing them to it. I did dance circles around my best friend and danced on my OWN which felt amazing. My confidence has risen, world watch the hell out!

I love to eat chinese food. Who doesn’t its so addicting and good. Well last Sunday, I walked all over gods green earth (awesome exercise too) taking pictures of my uncle and aunts family. It was a great time, and I felt like I was hounded on going to dinner. So I went, I broke down and called my mom saying were I was going. I looked in my bag, and found a shake that I can drink. So I went to dinner smelling all the awesome Chinese food, but never caved! I drank my shake and did a little info session on my family letting them know what I am having, and they ultimately supported me through it. It felt good to say NO to myself on temptation and be successful with it.

So here is my downfall, I hate exercise. It feels like a chore, and I hate doing chores. I need to find a routine that fits me personally so that I can do it without thinking. So far I came up with mall walking, and making sure the money and card is put away when I do. I haven’t went yet, so I am thinking because the weather is super crappy I will do that. I also have a indoor pool at my apartment complex (oh yes be jealous) which I don’t utilize at all. That I need to do fast! So, I am thinking one day walk, then one day pool. So four out of the seven days I am getting exercise.

Now I have an amazing support team to help me through this journey. I am not going to write today about them because this post would be a mile long. I am going to blog about them soon, and have my box of tissues next to me as well. I will need it.

Well that’s all folks!

I hope you enjoyed my rambling

Love

Kaylee